does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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