The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
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