I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Still dying that you shit outside
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
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