Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
that may or may not have been my penis.
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