dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize