We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
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