When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize