Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
They are going to name an STD after you.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
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