Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
