I don't remember. Are we still dating?
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
