Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
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