okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
Why is there bacon in the couch?
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
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