to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
and i looked up. we had an audience...
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
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