her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
third nipple confirmed
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Randomize
