Three words: puerto rican gang bang
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
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