I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
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