OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
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