It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
