A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
Randomize
