So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Randomize
