Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
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