He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
Randomize