no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Randomize
