And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
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