I think scott just propositioned me for sex
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Randomize
