what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Randomize
