if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
im drinking this country out of the recession.
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Randomize
