Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
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