how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
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