WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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