My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
Randomize
