You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
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