I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
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