is your mom at the bar?
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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