I like to think it a success when the cops are called
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Randomize
