Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
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