Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
Sorry my hands just texted you
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Randomize
