We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
