Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize