I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
