He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
