you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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