So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Randomize
