She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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