Whod you bang
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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