I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize
