So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
Somewhere out there, on several phones belonging to strangers, exists a video of me rapping Baby Got Back on stage in four inch heels that I stole from the drag queen. Also I made out with the chick with the octopus tattoo.
You have the best birthdays
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize
