And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize