Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
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