What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
Randomize
