I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Randomize