I like to think it a success when the cops are called
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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